Shared Experiences

Here’s a truth I’ve learned in kids ministry.

Parents want to have great experiences with their kids.

This is why they plan family vacations.  Trips to Disney World.  Jaunts to the local fun park.  Dinner at pizza joints where the games are expensive and the food is… well, less than palatable.

Parents love to see their kids smile.  Hear them laugh.  Listen to their creative perspectives on life.

In fact, as ministry leaders we understand the need for families to have more of these shared experiences at home.  But simply because mom and dad don’t make the time for them at home, doesn’t mean they don’t want them.  Sometimes it means they don’t know how to create them.

I love gourmet food.  But it doesn’t mean I know how to make it!

Just like Disney World offers activities that create shared experiences between parents and kids, there are tools you can put in your parents hands that will help them create shared experiences at home.

This is where the next component of the reThink Groups’ Orange philosophy comes into play.  You can read about the first component, Integrated Strategies, here and the second component, Refine the Message, here.

The third component is Reactivate the Family.

If we want to engage mom and dad on their child’s spiritual journey, it starts with small steps.  I think of them as “notches on the belt”.  In short, parents need some ‘wins’.  And here are a few I shoot for…

• Talk Time: Kid talks.  Parent listens.  Parent talks.  Kid listens.  Both feel heard.  If they create the habit of communicating the chances of spiritually significant dialogue increases.
• Game Night: I try not to call it “Family Fun Night” b/c it can sound too cheesy.  The point is a night together having fun.  Pick a game, gather around the table and play.  As many times as you can stand.  The point isn’t to get to the finish line.  The point is to play with your kids, enjoy the moment and laugh together.
• Spiritually Significant Moments: Equip your parent to respond to their child’s salvation/baptism inquiries.  Empower them to lead through those conversations.  These are the most obvious milestones their child will walk thru.  Let them have the honor and trust what God is doing.

Today’s average family has a schedule full of activities that take them in 5 different directions.  My goal is to open their eyes to the moments the family is together and equip them for positive shared experiences.  As they experience success they’ll create margin for more.

In the end, the goal is to Reactivate the Family and engage parents in the spiritual formation of their child.  It doesn’t have to mean an additional event for you to administrate.  Many times it just means encouraging parents in a different way.  If they actually believe they can do it… they will.

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