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I woke up this morning with a sense of sober fear.  As a children’s pastor I spend much of my mental energy thinking of opportunities and creative ways to equip parents for the journey of teaching their kids how to love & serve Jesus.

But this morning all I could think about is that my oldest is 10 years old.

To many of my readers this might seem like a small thing.  I’m clearly a young mom.  I never define myself otherwise.  But the truth is… the clock is ticking.  I’ve got less time with him before he moves out of my house.  The season where my influence is greater than the influence of his friends is coming to an end fast.

The last 10 years of my life have gone fast.  The pace of the next 10  years will be no different.

Yet as I write this post there is a sense of excitement and hope.  He’s 10 years old.  He can understand things his younger siblings cannot.  He can chew on spiritual truths and internalize them on a deeper level.  That’s exciting to me.

Sometimes I watch him as he processes things like why a homeless man would choose to spend money on alcohol instead of a place to stay.  Why a country would make Christianity illegal.  How a kid on the other side of the country could enjoy life in a home with dirt floors, no toilet and livestock walking around.

I want to have more of these conversations.  I’m praying for more of these interactions.

As a ministry leader I confess that I’ve had my share of moments where the ministry has superseded my role as mom.  Many opportunities for time with my son were lost due to ministry demands or just plain fatigue.  I’ve not done this perfectly.

But my hope is in the Author of great relationships.  And my prayer for the next 10 years is that He would keep my eyes focused on the opportunities ahead.  That I would maximize those opportunities and continue to foster a relationship with my son that is a source of refuge, encouragement, guidance & love.

I want him to love & serve Jesus with more passion than I ever thought possible.

I recently read the latest book by Tricia Goyer, Blue Like Play Dough.

The book is a fun, jovial read where Tricia talks about the common and uncommon challenges of being a mom, a wife and a follower of Christ.  I appreciate Tricia’s candor as she shares her life in print.  As a mom of 3, I found her thoughts and perspective encouraging.  Here are some of my favorite takeaways…

Truth be told, it wasn’t I who discovered God.  He came down and met me where I was.  I doesn’t matter to Him that I can hardly see my desk under piles of mail and bills and kids’ craft projects – He loves me just as I am…

Suddenly I’m more comfortable in my own skin.

…the perfection I long for will never be found in the place I live and parent and strive.  It’s found in who I turn to.  In who is waiting for me with open arms.  The problem isn’t whether God will show up.  It’s all about me not being aware that God is already here… that He has been in my life all along.

Drives me crazy when someone prays for God’s presence.  C’mon friends!  He’s here… whether we acknowledge it or not.

I moaned as I stepped over a pile of overdue library books and dirty laundry stacked at the top of the stairs…

Thank God for the honesty of another mother!  I needed that.

If I had wanted love to show up in sneakers and roam around my home, leaving no couch cushion unturned, no sock drawer undisturbed, then I found it in my husband and my three kids.

There’s something about our constant desire for escape in order to connect with God.  Rather than seeing how God works within the very people He’s placed under our roof.

Yet God isn’t content with a partial transformation.  He sees the stuff we want to hide and knows how much more beautiful we will be if we deal with the crud.

Leave no stone unturned.  No closets barricaded.  Address the mess and allow God to work through it in a way that only He can.

This is the kind of book you read, laugh, highlight, then pass along to friend.   It’s a great reminder of how God leads us, stretches us and ultimately molds us into His design.

So, what say blogging friend?  Who wants my marked up copy?  It’s been clearly (not gently) used, thoroughly enjoyed and comes complete with highlights and all.

Leave me a comment below and you’re name goes in the “hat”.  The winner will be named Thursday.

Psalm 139: 13-17

13 You made all the delicate, inner parts of my body
and knit me together in my mother’s womb.
14 Thank you for making me so wonderfully complex!
Your workmanship is marvelous—how well I know it.
15 You watched me as I was being formed in utter seclusion,
as I was woven together in the dark of the womb.
16 You saw me before I was born.
Every day of my life was recorded in your book.
Every moment was laid out
before a single day had passed.

17 How precious are your thoughts about me, O God.
They cannot be numbered!

This scripture is a life-preserver for me.  That which I cling to when I’m not even certain I remember who I am.  A pastor, a wife, a mom, a follower of Christ… each time I read it, I’m reminded of the One who knows exactly who I am.  His precious daughter.