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Posts Tagged "relationship"

Building Faith Skills in Kids (4 of 5)

Posted by on May 20, 2015 in Orange

Talking about the 5 skills to establish faith in our kids.  Catch the first 4 here.

Faith Skill #4: Articulate Faith

Create a safe place to discuss and wrestle with what kids believe.  This is key for our kids to make their faith their own.

Not just as parents, but as individuals, we can fear doubt.  We are scared of questions.  Sometimes it freaks us out when people question their faith.  We think we might lose them forever.  They might go off the deep end.

“Just have more faith.  Have more faith!”

I’m not discounting faith.  It’s a vital component to your relationship with Jesus.  But in order to make something your own, sometimes you’ve got to wrestle it down yourself.   I appreciate a good sermon, but I value scripture more when I labor through, question and digest it myself.

Give people in your home the space and the safety to question.  Have less faith in your explanations of God… and have more faith in the work God is doing in the midst of the wrestle.

Some of the best parenting advise I’d ever heard came from a 23 year old single man.  He said…

Talk less.  Pray more.

Do questions make you uncomfortable?  Do you allow people to question and wrestle with their faith?

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girls have lots of words

Posted by on Oct 25, 2013 in My Life, Parenting


There are proven statistics, apparently.  I’m sure someone reading this blog will know their source.

When my 14 year old was younger, there were days I would completely forget to drop my son off at school.  I’d be within a mile of my office and glance in the rear view mirror only to see my son sitting in the backseat… lost in thought.

He was so quiet, I forgot he was there.

Lost in my own thoughts, I would drive right past his school.

Not much has changed today. He’s a man of few words. I have to ask very targeted questions in hopes of gaining insight into what’s going on inside his teenage head.

Not so with my daughter. She has lots of words. And they must be released in a steady stream of dialogue throughout her day.

A few days ago I picked her up from swim practice. As we walked into a nearby McDonald’s to buy ice cream, I said,

“Tell me everything that happened today.”

It was like releasing the green flag in a NASCAR race. The words burst forth.

As we drove to pick up her little brother from Boy Scouts, the torrent of topics abated she grew quieter and started thinking internally. She sighed with a sense of satisfaction.

It’s such an odd dynamic between my son and daughter.

My son needs time to internally process before he can externally communicate.

My daughter needs time to externally communicate before she can internally process.

And giving her a defined time and opportunity to externally communicate to me shows her how much I value her. It’s a great reminder for me that she needs my time. Not just quality… but quantity. Where the only equation his mom’s attention and daughter’s words.

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Kidmin Volunteers: The Power of Team

Posted by on Nov 3, 2011 in Leadership, Ministry

Lately we’ve seen some amazing connections occur within the volunteer team in fpKIDS.  It’s always amazing to me to be a part of a ministry that fosters relationships and connects people around a common cause.

We’ve spent the past year rebuilding our volunteer team within our Preschool Ministry at the Pellissippi Campus as Faith Promise Church.  With the launch of our first multi-site in October 2010, we sent out the former Preschool Director, Mia Hannahs, and a large number of strong volunteers to launch that campus.  As a result, the Blount Campus has been a great success from the beginning.

However, the shift in leadership within the Preschool volunteer team at Pellissippi took it’s toll.  The core of volunteer leadership remained strong within the team but (as with any shift in leadership) some of our volunteers on the periphery found this as an exit opportunity.

The depletion to the team was a struggle for several months.  But with a ton of inviting, we’re watching this team grow and gain health.  The cool thing is seeing the number of people joining the team as a result of an invitation that came from another volunteer.  I look around many times and the people I see are not faces I’ve recruited.  But they came as a result of a volunteer inviting their friend to join them in ministry.  I love that.

Currently, I’ve got a team of volunteers that serve in our 3-year old room.  Some serve on Saturday night while others serve at our Sunday, 11:45 service.  One team member is out of commission right now as she recovers from complications from surgery.  The beauty is watching this group work together to ensure that our Saturday night team and Sunday 11:45 team are covered while they’re “one man down”.

It’s a gift to get to work with volunteers that see the vision of what they do and know the ministry they steward.

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Kidmin Product Review: Spiritual Parenting DVD Series

Posted by on May 2, 2011 in Leadership, Ministry, Product Reviews


Michelle Anthony is the Pastor of Family Ministries at ROCKHARBOR Church, the Family Ministries Architect for David C Cook and the author of the book Spiritual Parenting.

Launching off the book Spiritual Parenting, Michelle created a DVD series designed to help parents to identify what Spiritual Parenthood looks like.  This 6-session series leads parents through the implementation of the concepts Michelle shares in her book.

I appreciate the big picture posture this video series adopts.  In a world where most adults are asking, “What would SuperNanny do?” I love how Michelle redirects parents’ attention from behavior modification to the transformation of the heart.

This DVD series is a solid tool for churches to use for small groups, parenting workshops, retreats and bible studies.  Each DVD is set up in a group teaching type session with Michelle as the main teacher.  An increasingly more popular style of video learning.  Here are my random, critical thoughts of the product.  Admittedly, these are based upon my humble opinion…

  • Although I did not have access to the other elements of the teaching kit, I assume that each time the video breaks for an exercise, the accompanying participant worksheet walks participants through the exercise.  It seems logical that these exercises could be built into the videos.
  • I’m a fan of experiential elements integrated into teaching videos via b-roll images that further emphasize the teaching point.  I think it helps to refocus your audience.
  • The videos are lengthy.  I’m curious how much could be shaved out of the presentation to make it more succinct.  When you factor in the time necessary for each exercise incorporated into the series the hour turns into 90 minutes.  When it comes to Small Group & seminar/workshop settings, I see greater success when the overall teaching does not exceed 45 minutes.

That said, there is a ton of wisdom taught in this series.  Here are a handful of nuggets I gleaned just from the first few videos…

  • Our job isn’t to transform our children! What is our job?  hmmm
  • Create environments where we’re actually putting our kids in the path of the divine.
  • We’re students to that unique child God entrusted to us.
  • God, what is it You want to do in the life of my child right now.  And let come along side of it.
  • It’s easy for us to fixate on exposing our kids to good people… but we have to keep our eyes fixated on the goal.  The goal to pass on a vibrant transforming faith.
  • Godly behavior is a bi-product of a firm conviction and a personal surrender.  Parents can get too caught up in the behavior component b/c we cannot control firm conviction or personal surrender.
  • As spiritual parents, we need to give ourselves permission to show that personal surrendering is a messy thing.
  • Faith flows from relationship.  The abundance of knowledge doesn’t breed faith.

So, if you’re asking the question,

How do I help the parents in my ministry see the bigger picture, get a vision for their child’s faith and embrace the tools sitting at their fingertips?

then the Spiritual Parenting DVD series is a great option.

You can purchase the series here.

Follow Spiritual Parenting on Facebook here.

Follow Michelle on Twitter here.

Either way… take the product and make something happen.

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Can We Please Get This Straight!

Posted by on Apr 21, 2011 in Leadership, Ministry

I don’t typically rant.  At least not on my blog.  🙂

I like to leave lots of room to change my mind later. 

However, today I’m on a soap box.

I recently read the testimony of a young adult and their experiences over the past few months as she rediscovered her faith and is now in a growing relationship with Christ.  The story is precious and a wonderful testimony of how God shepherds us back to Him.

But the statement I can’t shake is a common thought among adults.  She says this,

“I met Christ when I was young.  But I grew up in church just going through the motions.”

Here are some other statements I’ve heard in the past…

“I was baptized as a kid, but I really didn’t know what I was doing.”

“I accepted Jesus as a child, but it didn’t mean anything.”

This is a common mentality in adults.  That any spiritual decisions or investments made as a child were meaningless because they didn’t fully understand what they were doing at the time.

I think this is bogus.

My kids brush their teeth every morning.  They shower every night.  They eat healthy.  They look both ways before crossing the street and they don’t climb into cars with strangers.  They’re learning to respect authority, make wise decisions and to act increasingly independent of their parents.

Simply because they don’t fully understand the impact of these daily decisions does not discount the benefit of said decisions.

In other words… just because my 5 year old doesn’t understand the physiological benefits of brushing his teeth daily with fluoride toothpaste doesn’t discount the benefits his teeth gain.

I’m certain there are plenty of people out there that simply went through a ritualistic response in an emotional moment without really making a spiritual decision for salvation.  No doubt I have peers that “walked the aisle” just as I did at 6 years old yet they never really made a decision to accept Jesus’ payment for their own sin.

These very same people encounter Christ as an adult and realize they never made a decision for Him so much as walked through a set of steps their parents encouraged them to take.  I get that.

However… I think we have an epidemic of adults who discount true, sincere, heart felt decisions made as a child.  They attribute their ‘wandering’ as a young adult to a lack of sincerity or understanding of the decision they made when they were younger.  In reality, their departure from Christ is not evidence that they never received the gift of salvation.  It’s merely evidence that they took their eyes off the Giver of the Gift.

There are plenty of times in my life where I’ve taken my eyes off of Christ.  And that is evident in the decisions I make.  As I’ve grown in my relationship with Him, I stray less.  Doesn’t mean I don’t ever stray at all.  It just means I don’t get far down the road before I’m reminded that He is my source of Abundant Life… and I return.  However, none of this discounts, detracts from or eliminates the spiritual decisions I’ve made in my past… whether as a child or adult.

Here’s the reality… I made a decision at 6 years old to accept Christ’ death on the cross as payment for my sin.  At 26 years old I understood more about the realities of daily walking with Christ than I did at 6 years old.  And now at 38, I understand even more than I did at 26.  Simply because I comprehend my own humanity more today than I did as a child doesn’t discount the fact that I understood enough at 6 to make the right decision.

Scripture says we are created in the image of God.  Therefore a child responding to the Gospel message is a response they were designed to make.

Let’s stop devaluing the choices a child makes simply because they don’t know as much as an adult.

Instead let’s dive in, celebrate and commit ourselves to demonstrating for them what it looks like to live a life yoked with Christ.  So they may progressively learn that as their humanity fights to draw them away from Christ, abiding in Him is their source of Life.

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